Who we want to be next

Tonight I was all set to talk about self-discipline, setting routines for ourselves and my efforts at setting a 30 day goal to establish a bedtime of 11. Now it has been an interesting experience in my efforts to figure out why I am not going to sleep at night. I realized this week that sleep hasn't been my friend, now I don't mean this in a I wake up a lot in the night sort of a way, but more as in I just put off going to sleep. So this week I ended up writing a letter to sleep and asking why it is that we seem to be on the outs so often. It was rather interesting seeing what I got back.


  I learned that there were many things in store for me to learn and become, but I needed to learn the self-mastery with sleep before I could learn those things. It was pointed out to me that Heavenly Father could have made bodies for us that didn't need sleep, but He needed us to learn what we could learn only through proper stewardship of our bodies.

  So I left that letter bound and determined to master self-discipline and self-mastery. I was going to get my body into submission and value that more than anything else. Enter yesterday and today... Last night I wanted to do some work in a couple different areas of my life, so that meant lots of journaling, then I knew I wanted/needed to do some work on a quilt, and start a new blog addressing some different ideas than just the ones I share each week. I also knew I needed quality time with my spouse and a friend working through some stress. Because of all those things my bedtime goals were a dream in the rear view mirror. At the same time I felt like I had still been doing what I needed to be doing.

Now I don't share these things to say look how much I have accomplished or look how amazing I am. I share these so I myself can see how differently my day turned out from what I thought it would be. And I'm sure we can all relate, we have our best laid plans, we try to set out our routines and establish our righteous desires and it can be discouraging at times to see them not play out as we hoped. We can sometimes feel we are failures when because of the situations of others our situations change. I hope it is in moments like those that instead of feeling a failure or thinking our efforts are for not, that instead we take heart that we like the Savior have succored those in need and have been about our Father's business.

  Our Heavenly Father is seeking for those who want to be about His business, who want to reach out to those whose hands hang down, to share a kind word and to be one with Him in His purpose. This sometimes means our best laid plans go to the way side. This sometimes means our human efforts may feel very puny and not near enough. Yet as a dear friend and I talked about tonight, we need to trust that when He calls He qualifies and magnifies efforts. When we are seeking to help those around us, to reach out to them, He will offer us direction, not only for those we can help, but also so we can magnify our efforts to make the most of the time we have. The Atonement of our Savior Jesus Christ can fill the gap from our efforts to His best outcomes.

   I testify that as we work to reach out to those with feeble knees and as we work to establish routines of righteousness in our lives that He can help us do both. As we put in our best efforts to progress and improve and to heed the voice of the Spirit we really can become all we hope to be. We can be a successful whoever it is we want to be and be His servant. Often the adversary preaches that it is one or the other. We either put all our effort into being successful and doing our thing or we submit wholly and completely to God and give ourselves up. I think that as we ask God first what He needs of us, we will then be surprised at how much He does for us to help us reach who we want to be next.