What to keep

This has been an insane week, a beautiful week, though still insane. As many of you are probably aware I have been creating a mentoring business the last few weeks and can I just say how it has rocked me to my core. For a long time I've worked an 8-5 job, working hard all day, coming home each night feeling as if I've been beaten up and reading books just as fast as I could get through them. Now even though I am busier than I have every been (working 8-5, having mentor appointments during my lunches, team calls every morning at 6, and trying to grow a website and online presence) I love my life and I'm not hiding in books anymore.

I've been on a journey trying to figure out what it is that I really want to help people to do. It is easy to say you want to help people, but hard to know how that really translates in the doing. How do I reach out to people, how do I explain what I want to do, caring so much about Heavenly Father, but not wanting to turn people away before they want to learn more, how to do it all?

And then to add to all those questions was this negative voice saying that no one liked me, that everyone else was awful and just spreading this nasty poison inside my mind. I knew I didn't want it there and I knew it wasn't serving me, but it seemed the harder I prayed the nastier the voice became. Finally I opened a word document and I just wrote out all the negativity in my mind and I got it all out. Only once I had acknowledged everything that was there and admitted to what I was feeling was I finally able to quiet that voice in my mind. So often when those things enter our mind we think we need to push them down, to bury them deep down and far away so that no one will ever know how awful we are. I assure you, you are not awful, you are just a mortal having a mortal experience, subject to all the nasty voices that come will mortality. We are not judged for the thoughts that pop into our heads, our destiny is determined by what we choose to do with them once they get there. Instead of burying them down deep inside of us where they can come up again and again every time that trigger comes up, instead what if we chose to really get rid of them, to put them on paper, on paper where no one else will see them?



I think sometimes we think if we get it out of us that will make it more real, it doesn't, by putting it on paper we actually recognize that those thoughts aren't ours and we don't want them, we recognize them for the lies we are and it is easier to not believe a lie, once you know it is a lie. So the next time those negative thoughts (about yourself or others) pop into your head, I encourage you to grab a piece of paper or a word document and write them all up, recognize what is really going on, then my personal favorite is to rip it up and chuck it in the garbage. Then find something good to tell yourself. Create the good, so there is less space for the bad to take root. Soon you'll find when bad things come in, you have more of the good to combat them with.  Happy writing, and happy being the one who chooses what stays in your brain. We have been told the lie that if we feel it, then we should say it. Instead if we feel it, we should write it, then we can determine what we want to say and what we want to throw away.